This story is not about the story time however, as William didn't even make it past the first 10 pages of the first book. No. This story is about William and his first experience with animals that walk around like man, that try to give him high fives and hugs and walk around with logos on their chests. This story is about William, and his first experience with the noble job of mascot.
His mom saw it first, the upper body of a red shirted cow making its way around the malls walled play area. After a few pokes she convinced me to turn around and she pointed towards the majestic creature that was giving all of the children big, bovine hugs. I am not sure this is the best idea, as teaching your kids to hug cows cannot possibly be the best lesson for them to learn should they ever find themselves in that situation.
My girlfriend and I both agreed that the cuteness factor of William hugging a giant cow would counteract any negative effects it may do to his one year old psyche so I picked him up and we made our way to the hugging herbivore. We stood near the wall and I placed him on the ground, his legs automatically backpedalling until he was pressed up against my shins. He pushed against me, terrified of this animal that walked like a man. I walked him forward, until we stood right in front of the unnatural creature. With his hand out for a high five William took a step forward, in the direction of his mommy, fleeing from this situation he now found himself in.
William and I sat down in anticipation for story time on the blue mats they had placed so that children need not sit on the floor. Next to us sat the cow, as in right next to us. William stared at it for over five minutes, his gaze fixed squarely on this affront to his world view. It was around the sixth minute where he accepted that the cow was not going to eat him and that he could touch it. After touching it for a few minutes he began to walk towards a newcomer. A bee from the local radio station who also sponsored the event had shown up and was standing near the wall where my girlfriend was. Towards this bee he was much friendlier. High fives and smiles abounded, but still he refused to hug the creature.
It was then, after a few more minutes of figuring out exactly what these creatures were, that he decided to tell the public of his findings. Standing in front of the cow, and in front of all the children (While an employee was reading the stories) he began to spout off a rambling sentence of gibberish that could only be about these animals that dared think they could act like people, and no matter how much clothing they wore they could never be best friends with humans. It was at this time we decided he was too much of a distraction to the other kids and took him away to get some lunch, where the cow and bee would no longer cause him such fits of confusion.
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